Lyrics

 SONG LIST

 KETCHUP

Every seven setting suns
Ground up soy and whole-wheat buns
Spatula and two plates clean
Patties on the foil—we’re all set to broil

And if you’re still on the fence
Why not add some condiments?
Mustard, pickles, leafy greens
But now the fridge door’s spread, and not one bottle’s red

My God, you forgot the ketchup—you knew we need more
Don’t try telling me this is my fault—you were just at the store

Baby, I don’t wanna fight
It’s too early in the night
Why don’t I throw on some shoes?
Keep our dinner heated—I’ll get what we’ve needed

Then I saw the candy aisle
Got distracted for a while
Came home with some Charleston Chews
Something in your eyes made me realize

My God, I forgot the ketchup—the thing I went out for
You must think my memory’s like that of a brachiosaur

Baby, don’t be blue…maybe we can try Ragu

Seven days go by in vain
Still we eat our burgers plain
With each shopping trip this week
We forgot, in haste, our tomato paste

But it’s not so bad a loss
Getting used to barbecue sauce
I’ve still got you when life looks bleak
Plastic bottles?  Please!  You are my main squeeze

We always forget the ketchup—you know that it’s true
But one thing I’ll always remember is forgetting with you
It don’t really make any difference what goes on my bun
’Cause while you may make burgers boring, you make life so much fun

Oh yeah, you make life so much fun



 AMERICAN

Watch the TV to relax, make your body slip through cracks
If you want to be a millionaire
Well, wash your hands before you eat, regulate breath and heartbeat
Filter unclean air

Knowing you’re in control, lose your grip on heart and soul

Don’t go out alone at night, brush teeth ’til you’re pearly white
Make sure to reserve life in advance
Well, have it your way, Mickey D—have the same Big Mac times three
Don’t believe in chance

Calculate how to live—clean syringe and a sedative
You’re an American
You’re an American
And you rule the world—yes, you rule the world

Kids believe in closet ghosts, parents in white picket posts
Both believe in God because they’re told
Well, earn an “A” for “affluence,” standardize your preference
Buy before it’s sold

Chase what you don’t have yet—site-seeing on the internet
You’re an American
You’re an American
And you rule the world—yes, you rule the world

Don’t eat fat or else you’re dead, three clicks to adjust your bed
Learn how to predict just what you’ll get
Well, lather, rinse, repeat your day, bandage death and pain away
But you can’t predict regret

Everything makes sense—rationale is your defense
You’re an American
You’re an American
And you rule the world—yes, you rule the world, don’t you?
You’re an American
You’re an American
And you play by the rules—yes, you play by the rules



 
I’M GIVING UP CHURCH FOR LENT

I’m giving up church for Lent
I’m curbing my urge to repent
Living as best I can as an un-pious man
I’m giving up church for Lent

Five whole Sundays straight
Of sleeping in real late
I’ve got to stay resolved and push on, un-absolved
Five whole Sundays straight

So long…
So long…
Without a single drop from the Blood of Christ
Without a single verse from a hymnal song

I’m giving up on prayer
Every night, I swear
Repressing all the while the need to reconcile
I’m giving up on prayer

For forty days and nights
I must go without rites
Sermon and Eucharist—these things will not exist
For forty days and nights

So long…
So long…
Without a single drop from the Blood of Christ
Without a single verse from a hymnal song

So if I have to choose
I’ll give up priests and pews
I’ll see no altars glow, I’ll hear no organs blow
If I have to choose

Because I’m giving up church for Lent
I’m curbing my urge to repent
Living as best I can as an un-pious man
I’ve finished my search for
I’ll stray from God’s perch for
I’m giving up church for Lent



 NON-PARTISAN

You say freedom—I say equality
I like the common good—you like responsibility
I want free healthcare—you say it can’t exist
You are the bigot—I’m the sissy Communist

Why do we argue?  Why can’t we get along?
Why do we scream and shout when there is no clear right or wrong?
Well, I’m sick of fighting, I’m tired of all the names
We are all brothers, we’re all the same

I’m gonna change this world, I’m gonna make things right
Global warming will be stopped when I block out the sun with nuclear fucking bombs
I’ve said, “Make love, not war,” you’ve said, “Bring on the fight”
You thought Iraq was fun?  Get ready for a hundred-thousand Vietnams
There will be nothing left for us to fight about
Because there simply will be nothing left

You say, “Stop,” I say, “Fucker, don’t tempt me”
You say it’s dirty business, I say, “Good, they’ll tax-exempt me”
You say, “This is no joke—your behavior is beyond rebuke”
I say, “Fuck you.  I’ve got a nuke”

Mankind’s dim candle is now flickering
Gay pride rainbows can’t exist if I block out the sun with nuclear fucking bombs
Our petty differences and bickering
I’ll turn it all to ash—Behold as I unleash the storm before the calm
There will be nothing left for us to fight about
Because there simply will be nothing left

…right
…left
…right
…common ground

In this world nothing’s right, so I’ll make sure nothing’s left
I don’t wanna keep exploding at you
In this world nothing’s right, so I’ll make sure nothing’s left
Maybe I haven’t really thought this through

This might blow up in my face, but I think if we
Can’t share a warm embrace, why not try cold fusion?

At the political epicenter, we’re all the same

If God is on your side, then say your fucking prayers
Pro-Life won’t mean anything—all infants will be stillborn as the radiation leaks
I’m splitting atoms so we don’t keep splitting hairs
I’m changing all the rules—I’ll level the playing field, so to speak
There will be nothing left for us to fight about
Because we’ll simply agree

You don’t like Darwin?  Well, I’m here to prove you right
Life on Earth will not adapt when I block out the sun with nuclear fucking bombs
There will be nothing left to not be right about
Big businesses will donate nothing, my plan costs taxpayers nothing
All because there will be nothing left



 THE SATAN SONG

Let’s get down with Satan!

Satan, yeah!  I wanna see you groove!
Satan, yeah!  From your horns down to your hooves!
Satan, whoa!  I’ll sell my soul to you if you dance for me in your blue suede shoes!

Satan, whoa!  My disco fever’s burnin’!
Satan, whoa!  On your pitchfork I am turnin’!
Satan, yeah!  I was a believer, now I’m dancin’ with the Great Deceiver!

Row, row, row your boat down the river Styx
’Cause Satan, you invert my crucifix!

Woo!

Row, row, row your boat down the river Styx
’Cause Satan, you invert my crucifix!

Satan, no!  My heart may not be righteous
Satan, no!  And I haven’t found the light yet, but
Satan, yeah!  You do the Twist so well, that I think I’ll take my chances in Hell!

So if you wanna break it down with Satan’s party mix
Hit jukebox number 6-6-6!

Well, let’s have some fun!
Satan, man, I must be dreamin’, you are such a funky demon
Out in the Sun!
When my lungs are scarred and steamin’, you’ll be dancin’, I’ll be screamin’
My friend Satan!
I don’t need no Eden’s Garden—Beelzebub, I beg your pardon
Well, he’s the one!
Will you let me dance with you?
Oh Yeah!

Satan, yeah!  Come on and bust a move!
Satan, yeah!  I wanna see that groove!
Satan, whoa!  I was a believer, now I’m dancin’ with the Great Deceiver!



 MY CREED

Sitting on a train, listening as the rain
Taps into my deepest wishing well
Fantasies of futures past, dreams of joys that ever last—
In un-freed waters dwell

So I sit and watch the fields blur away from ticking wheels
And I can hear no cries
As the sun comes out and sings, robing clouds like gilded kings
Of the skies

This song is my prayer, and I’ll go anywhere to find you, my love
This song is my creed, and it begins, “I need to find you, my love”

I had made my first stop on the highest hilltop
Stretching out among the trees
Branches shaking hands with Mars as their leaves eclipsed the stars
Romanced by summer’s breeze

But I only stayed awhile—she made me jealous with her smile
For nature feels no pain
And I’ve learned I’m at rest only when in motion, soaking up life’s locomotion
As glorious birds surround this train

This song is my prayer, and I’ll go anywhere to find you, my love
This song is my creed, and it begins, “I need to find you, my love”

And I want to believe
Yes, I want to believe
But all I can do is need…is need
So that’s my prayer and my creed

So I crawl from place to place, longing just to see your face
And be washed in your rain
I may be on the wrong track, but there is no turning back
When on this train of thought

This song is my prayer, and I’ll go anywhere to find you, my love
This song is my creed, and it begins, “I need to find you, my love”
This song is my prayer, and I’ll go everywhere to find you, my love
This song is my creed, and it begins, “I need to find you…to find you, my love”

 EXISTENTIAL PATHOLOGY

I remember Lego blocks, video games and Christmas socks
And long walks on dead-still mid-summer nights
G.I. Joes, Godzilla flicks, cosmic heavy-metal licks
Now all contained in views of distant lights

Well now my life is in full gear, but one day life will disappear
I only hope these memories will count
If I choose my own destiny, the question on my mind should be:
To what does even the perfect life amount?

I’ve been searching my mind, hoping to find room for my soul

Therapists think I’m okay—“Son, go chase your dreams,” they say
But all I want to be is more awake
Twelve steps to achieve success, fulfillment, and happiness
But what if more than my happiness is at stake?

I’ve been searching my mind, hoping to find room for my soul
I don’t keep me alive—I was born and I’ll die, so why take control?

I’ve been searching my mind for room for my soul
I’ve been hoping to find a place it can go
If I can’t find it there, I’ll go out of my mind
Hoping there’s something out there of the infinite kind

Of the infinite kind…

See they say everyone’s got their own thing, their own special song to sing
Well all my special songs are on “repeat”
And it’s not a lack of self-esteem, it’s not depression or bad dreams
It’s an existential pathology

I’ve been searching my mind, hoping to find room for my soul
I don’t keep me alive—I was born and I’ll die, so why take control?
I’ve been lost in my mind, desperate to find room for my soul
Am I living a lie?  Was I born just to die, or is there some eternal goal?

Some eternal goal…

 SUMMER RAIN

I’m feeling so damn low…I couldn’t tell you why
The days go by so slow…too hot and dry
But when I feel those big black clouds come rolling over me
I raise my chin and praise the sky

I’d like to take a walk in this bright blue summer rain…

I’d love to take a walk on a rainy summer day
I know that deep inside there’s a light that shines my way
My skies are fair in the open air of your clouded gray
Oh, rain, rain, won’t you stay another day?

And when the drops come splashing down onto the street
I smile as I watch them crashing from Heaven to my feet
As streaks of lightning flash white glimpses of the world to me
My heart thunders with each and every beat

I’d like to take a walk in this bright blue summer rain…

I’d love to take a walk on a rainy summer day
I know that deep inside there’s a light that shines my way
I feel so warm in the eye of the storm, in a cloud of gray
Oh, rain, rain, please oh please don’t go away

In the middle of the storm is where it’s at
Standing eye to eye where nothing matters, oh no
In the middle of the swarm, the queen attacks
Filling to the sky with holy waters…holy waters

I wanna take a walk with you

I would like to take a walk, a walk with you…
I’d like to take a walk in this bright blue summer rain…
Take a walk…rainy summer day
Deep inside…a light that shines my way

I wanna take a walk with you
I don’t know why I feel so blue
But I just know that if I go
I’m gonna feel as good as new

Take a walk with you

 UNPARTED SEA

Anybody seen my Valentine there across the sea?
My cut-out heart turned into art and tucked away by me
Is it broken; is it lost—my love’s delivery?
Will my Valentine return to me?
Did they find my Valentine? Can someone check and see?
Will my Valentine, will my Valentine be returned to me?

Anybody seen my Valentine here where thoughts run free?
The pen is stroked, rights invoked—what will be will be
But what is penned in, what is signed, may alter destiny
Will my Valentine still speak for me?
Things insured may yet unveil how fragile they can be
Where’s my Valentine, where’s my Valentine’s first-class guarantee?

What if these pages truly turn the tides, but in their wake we find
That every message we might send decides just what we leave behind?
What if I know where these waters flow, but no place I go and no one I show
Can help me any longer?
What else can I do but pray to some unparted sea:
May my Valentine, may my Valentine be handled carefully?

I’m at loss; I’m at the whim of these distant powers that be
Will my Valentine, will my Valentine be returned to me?
Do I believe love will reveal the chink in the fortress wall?
Do I believe love bound by lead and ink is really love at all?
Do I believe? What do I believe? For what do I grieve? For what can I leave
This place when nothing’s holy?
What is broken, what is lost may not mend easily
Will my Valentine, will my Valentine be worth all this to me?
What is worth all this to me?

What is broken, what is lost—may it fade from memory
Farewell, Valentine, may that gentle brine yet yield a home for thee
For the shores long to be free
As that old, unparted sea

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